Something a little different this month – a spiritual practice I’ve found helpful…

with photos I recently took at the Morton Arboretum (something I’m grateful for).

My Gratitude Journal:

About a month ago, I resurrected my Gratitude (Thankfulness) Journal.

I resurrected it because I could sense a nagging feeling of discontent in my spirit, with more scarcity thinking than abundance mentality.

For some reason, it’s rather easy for me to slip into a mindset of scarcity, focusing on what’s lacking in me, in my life, and in the world. 

I read the newspaper or watch news programs mostly spotlighting the bad things in the world and I feel subtly drawn into a less abundant outlook.  I hear some Christians spending more time and energy talking about who and what they’re against, rather than who and what they are for, and I start to feel less hopeful and more constricted by an atmosphere of scarcity and negativity.  Life in general seems to hold its share of conflicts, demands, and emotional drains.  

If I don’t watch my healthy rhythms of life and make sure I keep getting filled up, I can slowly become depleted, exhausted and drawn away from the abundant life I believe Jesus wants to lead me toward.

My soul was longing for refreshment.  So every evening, I reviewed my day and I wrote down three things that I was grateful for.  After a few days, I could already feel a difference internally.  A shift was happening.  I was retraining my mind, watching for the good, and celebrating the abundance God has for me in this life.

I was being ushered into a place of more abundance where I connect with God and others in life-giving ways.  

This spiritual practice has been helping me abide in him and remain in the present moment, practicing the Presence, noticing all that’s good in the here and now, and observing and celebrating who God is and what he is doing in me and around.  It seems to bring me more life, more love, and more truth.

Another way I’ve approached this type of practice in the past has been to each day write down my high and low points of the day (or as the twentysomethings might say, my “happys” and “crappys”!) – those moments that brought me abundance, life, peace, joy, love and other good things, and those moments that brought me scarcity, death, shame, sadness, or fear.  Over time some patterns often emerged as I looked back at what brought me life and what snuffed it out.  By doing this, I’ve found that I have been better able to choose life and move toward those things that brought me abundance.

Somehow these types of spiritual practices help me see more clearly God’s presence throughout my day and I’m drawn into more intimate connectedness with him.

If you choose to resurrect one of these spiritual practices for yourself, I’d love to hear back about your experience.  Perhaps we could all learn and grow from what you’ve experienced.

“…with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. 
 And the peace of God, which transcends understanding,
will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.” (Phil 4:6b-7). 
I don’t think true peace comes without thanksgiving in some form.

“…whatever if true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things.” (Phil 4:8)

Have fun being thankful!  I’m thankful for you!

In His Love,
Randy

Follow-Up on Randi:

Here is a follow-up on Randi Bahnick’s month-long serving trip to Africa.  Just a reminder: Randi is a nurse in the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit at Children’s Memorial Hospital in Chicago.  The country in which she served has one of the highest infant mortality rates in the world.  She wrote the following while she was serving at a hospital in Africa:

Randi’s African Adventure:

“Salaam ah lay koom! or Peace be with you!  (I have no idea how you spell that!)

“Life at the hospital in Africa has proven to be very different from home.  We’re still getting used to the lack of supplies and cleanliness, and we are doing our best to teach the students how to do things in more medically sound ways.

“I’ve experienced multiple deaths and that’s been extremely difficult, especially because they don’t seem to initiate resuscitation all that well.  They just cope with the fact that their loved ones are going to pass.

“I keep praying that God will use me to be love to these people and that maybe, in some small way, I’ll be able to make a difference.  I’ve been able to make friends with many of the African students/nurses, which has been amazing.  They are so receptive to my teaching and that’s really encouraging.

“I feel like after two weeks of being here, I have finally found my niche – a place where my heart’s passions come a little more alive:

“A couple days ago, we went through a really rough 24 hours.  We were in the midst of having our own version of a 4th of July party when we all got thrown into an emergency c-section situation.  The baby was under fetal distress.  There was meconium detected, which gets everyone on edge a bit because we know there is a high chance the baby will be in respiratory distress once delivered.

“I was with another volunteer from Seattle, explaining the c-section process, when I started to have a bad feeling and wanted to prepare myself for delivery.

“The baby was delivered – blue and not breathing.

“We rushed the baby to our resuscitation table where I immediately found myself going into PICU (Pediatric Intensive Care Unit) nurse mode.  I started CPR and by that time, all five of us North American volunteers were in the room working on this precious baby girl.

“We worked and worked and worked, but unfortunately, the baby did not survive.

“As I stood there with the baby in my arms preparing to give her to the family so she could be buried, I was overwhelmed with the realization that there is still so much we could help with.

“The education level is low, the sense of urgency in emergency situations is low, and the medical critical thinking isn’t up to par.

“That night was very difficult for me, and for all of us, as I thought about how another precious, precious life was lost.

“Yet it changed my perspective on what I need to do in my remaining time here.

“The next morning wasn’t any better as we lost two more babies…(they seem to come in waves)…but once again, this fire started to burn within me.

“We’ve been taking action by doing some really good teaching with the nurse-midwife students and I think it’s starting to sink in.

“I made a bunch of posters that now hang in the resuscitation room and the labor room, teaching them about what to have ready before every delivery in case of emergency, the steps for newborn resuscitation and proper APGAR scoring.

“As soon as I hung a poster up, three midwives gathered around it to read it.  We got to talk about it! It was encouraging!

“We also started teaching a 3-day class on neonatal care and proper resuscitation.  This training is great because we are able to get the midwives one-on-one, to teach the proper CPR and resuscitation skills.

“I feel like this is the mark I can leave behind – working with individual nurses and making small changes in their practices.

“So, yeah, there are definitely some big struggles going on and some challenges to overcome, but there are some really, really great things going on as well.

“I finally feel like I have something to offer and am being used.

“Mayhartsinit (thank you)!  Thanks from the bottom of my heart for your continued prayers.  It is so encouraging to know I have you at home thinking of me and praying for me, my team, and for the people of Africa!” – Randi Bahnick

Mayharsinit (Thank You):

Hopefully many precious new lives will be saved from this day on, because of Randi’s time spent teaching and training, passing on some skills she has been blessed with.

What a beautiful way to open doors of love and dialogue between our very different worlds, countries, and faiths. 

I’m so proud of Randi and the team for having the courage, selflessness, and spirit to Go and Be Jesus with a people he passionately loves.

Thank you for playing a role in making this possible. You’re prayers and contributions are making a difference beyond this world.

In His Love,
Randy

“A generous man will himself be blessed, for he shares his food with the poor.”
Proverbs 22:9

Would You?:

Would you consider going to one of the poorest, most dangerous countries in the world to serve people you don’t know?

They Would!:

Two of the women I spiritually mentor are doing just that.  They recently embarked on a one-month and a two-month humanitarian trip to one of the poorest and most dangerous countries in the world - in Africa. 

They will be joining Scotty, another Legacy Shepherding mentoree, who has chosen to live in that country long-term, providing long-term humanitarian work, and hopefully creating opportunities for on-going dialogue and relational connection between our two worlds (See my previous blog on Scotty’s initial trip.  It’s fascinating!).

Randi Bahnick’s One Month Trip:

“I have been working in the Pediatric Intensive Care Unit at Children’s Memorial Hospital in Chicago for the past two years.  I have loved every day I’ve spent there and have been privileged to have learned so much from all the joyful, sorrowful and challenging daily experiences.

“An opportunity was presented to me to travel to Africa to volunteer my nursing skills at a maternity and children’s hospital.  After much prayer for direction, I decided to accept this opportunity, to provide nursing care to women and children.

“The health of the people in the country where I’ll be serving is among the worst in Africa, with one of the highest maternal and child mortality rates in the world!

“By volunteering at this hospital, I will not only be taking care of patients in the maternity and pediatric units, but will also be teaching and training nursing students so that they will be equipped to continue providing safe and effective care in their country, after I return home.

“It is simply amazing!  Obviously, I love working with kids and I originally went to nursing school to be a labor and delivery nurse, so this opportunity immediately pulled at my heart.  I don’t think I’ve been this excited about something in a while.” – Randi

Charity Thompson’s Two Month Trip:

“While in Africa, I will primarily be helping launch a non-profit organization.  The non-profit’s goal is to connect people around the world to the stories of individuals and communities of this particular country in Africa; allowing for a tangible way to be involved and make a difference.  The hope is that hearts will be touched and lives transformed on both sides of the world.

“Specifically, I will be involved in assessing the work of a 70 year-old woman who, twenty years ago, decided to make a difference by rescuing a baby from a garbage heap.  She took him home and raised him as her own.  Since then, she has rescued and raised over 200 children and started 6 schools for children who are too poor to otherwise attend one.”

This woman currently has around 23 children living with her.  She does it all without government help, which she refuses due to the corruption she has seen there.

“Even though she has accomplished so much, there’s so much more that could be done with outside assistance.  I’ll be looking for the most effective ways we can help.

“I’ll also be brainstorming other programs for the non-profit, taking language courses, hopefully helping out at a local orphanage that desperately needs assistance, as well as probably falling in love with the children of Africa.

“I’m most excited about the opportunity to share God’s love.” – Charity

Prayer Requests:

Randi and Charity would ask for your prayers:

“Please pray for our travels, our role of helping the African people with our skills and compassion, and for the impactGod wants to have on us and through us.  Pray that God moves in the hearts of His people in Africa.  And lastly please pray for our safety.” – Randi

Charity and Randi will have to wear floor length garments and head coverings while there, and won’t be allowed to interact with the men of the country.

They could use your prayers throughout the next two months.

I’ll most likely give you an update after they return.

Thank You:

Thank You:
Thank you for holding these precious ones up in prayer…including Scotty!  I’m sure this is going to be a transformational experience for all.

In His Love,
Randy

“First clean the inside of the cup and dish, and then the outside also will be clean.” (Matt 23:26b)

“We become like the God we adore.” – Unknown

The photos in this month’s update are from this Spring, in my yard.  I think they are appropriate, because this is a story of renewal, of Spring.

 
Cleaning the Lust on the Inside:

“I used to shame myself a lot.  I thought I needed to be hard on myself in order to change the parts I didn’t like about myself, like the secretive, lustful parts of me that were driving me toward an internet porn addiction.

“I believed I had to die to these lustful feelings and willpower my way into holiness.  I found that didn’t work very well for me.  I could only act purely and push down my lust for so long before I’d revert back to my old lustful ways, because nothing had changed internally.  Change had to come from the inside to be long lasting.

“Being critical, judgmental, and legalistic only caused my lusts to go into hiding temporarily and then act up even worse.  Whatever I pushed down became toxic in the dark and seeped out in unhealthy ways.  I thought marriage would change things, but to my surprise it didn’t.  The problem didn’t go away.

“Before finding a spiritual mentor, I’d never talked to anyone about these things.  I felt too much shame.  It didn’t feel safe to be honest about my struggles.

“Some of the shaming messages I heard seemed to tell me that I wasn’t being spiritual enough.  To be spiritual enough, I needed to overcome these lustful compulsions using the spiritual disciples – pray more, read my Bible more, claim Biblical truth more – to somehow appease God so he would finally draw near and help me.

“But he wasn’t helping me.  Nothing was working.  Why wouldn’t he help me?

“Apparently, I was doing something wrong.  It seemed I needed to change myself without his help, before he would draw near to me.  I concluded I needed to be even tougher on myself.  Internally, I lived as if God was a demanding taskmaster, and I was becoming like the god I’d created.

“Through this discipleship process, I’m realizing life-changing things about the way I’ve viewed God and religion, the way I’ve viewed myself, and the way I’ve viewed others (especially women).

“This journey has changed my paradigm and helped me to see things with new eyes.  My heart has been opening up in love and surrendering to that love.

“As I’ve brought things that were deeply rooted inside me into the light, they’ve been met with love.  Healing has been happening at a core level.

“I’m learning firsthand that Love heals.  Jesus is still saving and redeeming me – all the parts of me.

“As I’ve experienced God’s acceptance of me, I’m trying to accept myself more.  But how can I accept myself when I’m doing bad things?

“I’m gradually seeing the difference between accepting myself and accepting my behavior.  Underneath the bad behavior is a lovable person with some good desires – desires for love and intimacy.  The immature parts of me simply don’t know how to get those desires met in healthy ways.  These immature parts are scared and don’t know how to grow up.

“I’m currently treating my lustful parts as immature, wounded adolescents who need my love, encouragement, and guidance to grow up and heal.  This viewpoint is somehow helping me work with God in bringing about the changes he and I long to see.

“As I view it this way, I’m learning to be kinder to myself.  I’m seeking to understand myself on the inside – why I’m feeling the things I’m feeling, rather than ignoring them, pushing them down, or being overly critical of myself when I feel them.

“By looking under the surface with God, I’m learning how to love myself better and and how to invite and receive  God’s love into those deeply needy places within me – into my hurts, wounds, sins, shame, thoughts, and emotions – so they don’t have to hide or act out (like disregarded children acting up to get my attention).

“This shift has started to bring about inner transformation, which subsequently has led to an increased self confidence and an inner love that moves out into real relationships to love others better.

“I’m now offering myself my helpful love, not my wounding, harsh, discouraging criticism.  The spiritual disciplines are becoming friends, not whips to beat myself with.

“Amazing!  I’m changing on the inside, without beating myself up!  I’m helping others change without subtly beating them up too.

“I’ve never loved God, myself, or other’s more or better.” – Anonymous                                                        

Thank You:

It’s wonderful to see people finding incremental healing and growing in love, especially spiritual leaders who have the power and position to impact many people both positively and negatively.  On this redemptive journey, each one of us has the opportunity to become a wounded healer in our own unique way and in our own unique passion area through the individual journey God has brought each of us.

Thanks for your prayers and support for this ministry…and for reading these updates!

In His Love,
Randy

Follow Up on Todd:

Check out the video posted recently featuring Todd Katter, who I highlighted in a previous update.  He’s running an ultra-marathon of 56 miles in Africa to recruit sponsors for children impacted by AIDS in Africa, through World Vision.  Way to go, Todd!  I was very touched by your video.  Please be safe.

Todd Runs Comrades for Children in Africa from Todd Katter on Vimeo.

TED Conferences:

Have you checked out the TED conferences at ted.com?  It’s an annual conference that brings together the world’s most fascinating thinkers and doers from the areas of Technology, Entertainment, and Design (TED) and more.  These speakers are challenged to give “the talk of their lives” in 18 minutes or less.

A Colonoscopy Study - Learning From Our ENDS:

I was watching one talk from this year’s conference by a man named Daniel Kahneman about happiness: the riddle of experience vs. memory.  Though this wasn’t the conclusion of this particular speaker’s talk, it reminded me of a good lesson I try to pass onto the leaders I mentor: Finish well.

The speaker referred to a study done in the 1990’s, on patients undergoing colonoscopies.  Yikes!  Back then it was much more painful to have a colonoscopy.  The tubes didn’t bend like they do now.  In this study, every 60 seconds throughout the procedure the patient was asked to rate the level of pain they were experiencing.  

Here are two examples of the results they found:

On an experiential level, it would seem that Patient B had the worse experience.  It was over twice as long and reached or exceeded the levels of pain Patient A experienced.

But when they asked the patients about their experience right after the procedure and then again sometime later, Patient A had the worse memory of the procedure.

The researchers realized that Patient A’s memory of the experience was much worse than Patient B’s because a very critical part in the shaping of our memory of an experience is how the experience ends.  If the story ends badly, we will tend to have a worse memory of the entire experience.  Patient A had a worse memory of the experience because their pain was highest at the very end, whereas the pain for Patient B tapered off at the end, so by the time it was all over Patient B didn’t remember the experience as being all that bad.

The researchers found that for Patient A, if the doctors left the colonoscopy tube in for just a couple extra minutes without causing as much pain at the end of the procedure, Patient A would have a better memory of the entire experience (if that’s possible with a colonoscopy!).

Our remembering self is the one that makes future decisions.  If we remember an experience badly, we won’t want to repeat it or we’ll chose another alternative.  In this scenario, Patient A may choose never to have a colonoscopy again or they may choose a different doctor if they have another colonoscopy.

How Does This Relate To Life?:

How does this research relate to our everyday lives?  What about when something is coming to an end or is transitioning in our lives at church or at work or in our relationships?

Sadly, most of us have seen so few positive examples in our lives of how to finish well.  We’ve probably seen more examples of how not to finish well.  We’ve seen employers and employees not finish well at work.  We’ve seen relationships not finish well.  Most of what we’ve observed in many situations is how people’s emotional unhealthiness, woundedness, and lack of leadership initiative has impacted the way they ended things.

In the church, I’ve observed some ministries that have ended badly after years of amazing God-breathed blessings.  These endings were like train wrecks after an amazing ride through glorious mountain splendor, leaving many people hurt in the aftermath.  When things ended badly, people were less likely to get involved in another group, ministry, or leadership role, some even left the church altogether and never came back.

Thankfully, I’ve also observed ministries that have ended extraordinarily well.  Because of the wonderful modeling of these incredible Christian leaders who led well through the transitions, I’ve been encouraged (and attempt to encourage others) to expend the time and energy to  finish well when something is coming to an end or transitioning.  It can impact they way we all view the entire experience and our future involvement in similar experiences.

An Example of Finishing Well At Work:

When I left my job as a CPA to transition into full-time ministry almost four years ago, my boss of 21 years and his wife (Bill and Suzie Knopf) took me out to dinner at their Country Club on my very last day.  They were choosing to finish well. My boss asked me out to dinner shortly after I told him my plans.  “I can’t guarantee that I won’t cry”, I said to him, as my eyes started to get watery.  He waved his hand, brushing away my sentimentality.  He moved toward the door to escape.  Just before he walked out, he turned around and said, “I can’t guarantee I won’t cry either.”  Then he was gone.

That evening at dinner, we had a wonderful celebration of our precious years together.  After dessert, I told them that before we ended the evening I had some things I wanted to say.   “So often in life we don’t say the things we want to say.  We let fear get in the way.  I want to take this opportunity to make sure I say the things that I want to say.”  I held out my hands and I asked my boss’s wife if she would give me her hands.  She put her hands in mine.  I looked her in the eyes and told her what an amazing lady I thought she was.  I noted specific things I appreciated about her, and then told her that I loved her.  She told me she loved me too, and we hugged.

Then I came along side my boss.  I held out my hands and my boss put his big hands in mine, right there in the Country Club dining room.  I told him I wasn’t sure I could do this without crying, and immediately my eyes started to water.  My boss looked me in the eyes and said, “I love you, Randy. You have been like a son to me.”  Then both of us were teary.  I said the things that I wanted to say and he said the things he wanted to say.  It was a beautiful, amazing moment.  We truly finished well. I still hold fond memories of my boss and his wife and my whole experience at the accounting firm.

How I Attempt To Finish Well In Mentoring Ministry:

When I eventually must say goodbye to someone I’ve spiritually mentored, I always want to end with celebration, even if I’ll continue to see them outside of our mentoring relationship.   Usually that person and I will spend at least one meeting reminiscing over all the amazing things God did during our times together that we are thankful for, celebrating all the growth that has been experienced.  We will also spent a significant amount of time sharing personal affirmations with each other, telling each other what we love about each other and the positive character qualities we see in each other.  Doing this brings good closure to that season, giving both of us a chance to tell each other the things we want to say.  As I mentioned earlier, so often in life we don’t say the things we want to say.  We let fear get in the way.  Why are we so afraid to express love?  What’s the worst that could happen?  It’s nice to provide an opportunity, for myself and others, to say the things that we want to say as we come to a transition in our relationship.  I’ve had some truly beautiful times with people as we’ve finished well – sharing tears, stories, and encouraging words.  Marking the moment.  I’d encourage you to give this a try with those you lead.  Let me know what happens.

How Might You Finish Well?

How you end (or transition) a season of life might make a difference on how people view the whole experience and the relationship they had with you.  I encourage you to finish well.  Is there a season in your life that is ending or transitioning?  What would it look like for you to finish well?

Thank You:

Thank you so much for playing a role in this life-changing ministry.

In His Love,
Randy

Photos are from D Sharon Pruitt (search Pink Sherbert Photography) on flickr. 

Todd Katter plans to summit the tallest peak on each continent.
So far he has made it to the top of two.
The way things are going, I think
he’ll summit more than just mountains.

Spring, 2006:

When I first met Todd Katter, he was 27 years old and working as a manager at Deloitte Touche, a public accounting firm.  Outside of work, as a volunteer, he was leading a medium sized group of 20somethings in the city of Chicago (Metro212), as well as leading a small group in that ministry.  At the same time, he was getting his masters degree at Northwestern’s Kellogg School of Management…and dating!  (I needed a nap just hearing his busy schedule!)

Todd, like myself, was a CPA with a passion for the Lord, which flowed out into a passion for people and transformational ministry.  It wasn’t hard to see that God was going to do some cool things through Todd, things that would truly bless our world.

Todd Goes Into Full-Time Ministry:

Not long after I stepped into full-time shepherding ministry, Todd was asked to join the staff of Willow Chicago (the downtown campus of Willow Creek Community Church) as the Ministries Director, where he oversaw all the ministries and staff of the church.  Willow, like myself, saw his enormous potential. 

At that point, Todd and I began meeting regularly.  He desired to have a mentor pouring into him, so he could live out this new role to the best of his God given design. 

About a year ago, Todd was asked to serve as the Interim Campus Pastor – the lead role at Willow Chicago, a church that has grown to about 1,000.  In my opinion, he has done an amazing job of leading and growing the church.

I may be biased, but I believe our investment in Todd over these past years has paid huge returns.  From my viewpoint, the mentoring process has prepared, supported, and personally developed Todd in many ways essential for what he is doing now.  It has helped him live out more of his full potential by removing things that were holding him back. 

 Todd has run in 4 marathons (a Boston qualifier),
the last two raising support for World Vision.
He runs as one reaching the goal set before him.
He is currently training for a 56 mile ultra-marathon in Africa!

Here’s what Todd shared about some of the things God has done in his life through Legacy Shepherding Ministries:

Todd’s Testimonial:
“Four years ago, I first met Randy Guenther.  His reflective and thoughtful way of building our relationship struck me from the very beginning.  But I had no idea how profoundly his mentorship would impact my life.

“When we meet together on Wednesday mornings, Randy patiently listens to me rant and rave about my crazy struggles.

“One of his favorite quotes is ‘seek to understand’.  He models this in his conversations with me better than anyone I know.  As a church leader, whenever the inevitable ‘suggestions’ for improvement come my way, the ‘seek to understand’ advice has been VERY helpful!!

“While I know I’m definitely still ‘on a journey’, God has grown me tremendously through my times with Randy.

“Randy has helped me step away from the prison of people-pleasing, by teaching me to have a more healthy view of God and more fully realizing the infinite worth that He sees in me .

“I have seen how living in community adds color and meaning to life through sharing the deepest parts of our daily lives with others.  Through Randy’s encouragement, I’m now living this out by sharing an apartment with three other guys in Wrigleyville.

“Randy has taught me how celebrating God’s work in my life makes the work He is doing all the more lasting and memorable.  One summer day, Randy, his roommate Andy and I ended up dancing in a field as we banged away on pots and pans (don’t ask why!).  During one session in Autumn, we left the confines of his lovely ‘retreat center’ and danced around in the leaves outside (come to think of it, Randy seems to have a thing for dancing!).

“Whether we’re celebrating or crying together, Randy never fails to provide me with an endless supply of ice cold water—yes, he lives the simple life, and coffee and orange juice would be a bit too extravagant except on special occasions!

“Four years later, I am still a broken man.  But through my times with Randy, I have learned how to see my brokenness more clearly and have seen how God’s grace can find its way to heal my deepest wounds.

“More importantly, I have learned that, by ‘seeking to understand’ both the beauty and brokenness in others, I can love them more unabashedly as I pass on the baton of God’s wisdom and love that Randy keeps pouring into me. – Todd Katter

Randy’s Closing:

Todd has a huge heart for the city of Chicago.  He is an amazing leader, facilitating life-change in hundreds of lives.

And ladies, he’s still single!

Please hold Todd lovingly in your prayers.

In His Love,
Randy

Prison Fence photo by dogbomb on Flickr
Glass of water photo by OiMax on Flickr

Transparency:

Recently, around sixty 20something Missional Community Hub leaders and their team members went on an overnight retreat at an amazing log house in Wisconsin.  The topic for the weekend was Transparency (Transparency with God, self, and others).  I was invited along to listen and pray with anyone desiring an older person’s presence, especially if the talks and exercises stirred up difficult things that needed to be shared and brought into the light, that maybe they weren’t comfortable sharing with their peers.

What Was Holding Me Back?:
 
Before the weekend, I was debating whether I would go on Friday night for the whole retreat, or drive up separately,  joining the group on Saturday for the full day.  I’ve been on retreats like this before and I knew that when you get sixty 20somethings together overnight, sleep is not high on the agenda.  I was pondering how many days afterwards it would take me to recoup from one overnight “retreat”!

As I prayed about it and listened, I sensed promptings that I was supposed to be there for the whole retreat, Friday night as well as Saturday.  I wasn’t to let the possibility of lack of sleep deter me.  My excitement began to grow as I sensed some divine nudges.  What’s going to happen at this retreat, I wondered, specifically on Friday evening?

Who Shared What?:

On Friday evening, Devon Noonan led us through an exercise of identifying things that we really like about ourselves (yeah!).   Then she guided us into considering the parts that we don’t like about ourselves (ugh!).  Could we bring the parts we don’t like about ourselves to God?  Could we allow those parts to be loved?  We then had an opportunity to bring all the parts of who we are to God.

On Saturday, Tyler Grissom talked about building transparency in community.  How do we make our communities safe places for people to bring all of who they are into a loving setting where people can find presence, acceptance, affirmation, truth-telling, and forgiveness?  We had the opportunity to share in small groups some of the things we personally keep hidden (Yikes!).

Jon Peacock shared part of his journey/struggle around separating his worth (identity, value, and lovability) from his performance.  His performance may go up and down with successes and failures, but his worth is secure and constant in God’s love, never in jeopardy, no matter what he does, what he has, or what people think of him.

Living It Out:

The leaders shared vulnerably.

One of the things I deeply love about this group of Y- generation people, that I have the honor to work with, is their raw honesty.  I’ve been involved in church my whole life, and I haven’t previously seen the levels of honesty that this group of people reaches.  At best people may share something that they’ve already overcome, but what about being honest in the midst of the struggle, long before any overcoming has occurred, when one looks messy, weak, and vulnerable, when one could easily be judged and rejected? 

Throughout the weekend, I was privileged to watch people (especially Tyler Grissom) live out what we were talking about.  I had the opportunity to pray with some of them and get to know more of their stories.  I was and am continually inspired and challenged by them.

The Weekend Was A Success:

From the opening session on, I sensed God’s hand at work, opening people up to redemptive transformation.  I had some amazing talks with people in tender places throughout the weekend, especially on Friday evening.  (I’m so glad I followed the promptings I felt about attending the Friday night session.  It was a gift to be there.  I’m glad I didn’t miss out.)

Did I get any sleep?  Surprisingly, I did.  How?  Ear plugs!  What a great invention!  From what they tell me, the last group of energetic leaders didn’t get to bed until around 4:45am!  Though I didn’t get the amount of sleep I normally need, I somehow felt energized the whole retreat.  I attribute it to being lifted up in prayer. 

Prayer requests:

The weekend gave me opportunities to move toward some possible future mentoring relationships.  You can continue to pray for discernment around those possibilities. 

Thanks for holding these extraordinary leaders in your prayers.  Please continue to pray for the next generations and our efforts to bless them and bless our world.

In His Love,
Randy

Kyle Get’s Engaged!:

A special shout out to my nephew, Kyle, and his new fiancée, Stacy.  They recently got engaged!  They’ve been dating for six years, since high school prom.  Stacy already feels like family, having been around for years.  Soon it will be official!  Yeah!

Support Raising?  Yuck!  No Thanks!:

There are times when I think, that at some point in life, everyone should have the experience of raising support to meet their daily needs and to do whatever redemptive thing they feel led to do with their life.

It truly is an amazing journey – filled with humble surrender, redemptive trust building, hurtful discouragement, life-giving excitement, courageous fear conquering, and on-going faith strengthening; a journey I never thought I could or would do, until the more recent past.

Support Raisers’ Uplifting Stories:

I used to hear stories about people who lived on support.  Their stories often told of ways in which they saw God come through for them financially right when they needed it most – almost always to the exact dollar.

Our Current Economic Reality:

As you can imagine, 2009 was a tough economic year for non-profits, with people losing jobs and many people being concerned about their financial futures.  During the year, I heard of many non-profits that expected to end up in the negative for the year.  It looked like Legacy Shepherding Ministries might be among them.  There were times when it was discouraging and a bit scary when I wondered about the future.

Around October or November, I told Legacy’s Board of Directors that it would take a miracle for me to reach my bare-bones support raising goal for 2009.  God needed to raise around $8,000 within a couple months.  I’d done everything I could.  I’d made my “asks” of just about everyone I knew.  All I could do was send out my remaining monthly letters, wait, pray, and see what God might do.

Slowly, unexpected contributions began coming in, some from people I didn’t even know.  I was a little afraid to get my hopes up.  Would He possibly come through?

Something To Celebrate!:

Well, you can guess how the story ends.  It’s so easy for you to have faith.  It wasn’t happening to you!  Tee hee!

Including numerous checks written on the very last day of the year, God accomplished His miraculous mystery – contributions received exceeded expenses paid out by $139.57.  Amazing!  Something to truly celebrate!  The extra will most likely go toward the purchase of a printer and office needs that I put off buying, not being sure where this year would land – wouldn’t it be funny if my foregone purchases cost exactly $139.57?

I feel hopeful for the future, though I know 2010 will still have its financial challenges.

We Did It! Thank You:

When I ventured out into this world of ministry, I included a saying on one of my first support-raising letters: “A single snowflake can’t do much on its own, but if the snowflakes stick together, they can stop traffic.”  I feel like together, we stopped traffic; we made a difference in people’s lives and in the world.

Thank you so much for being a part of this – through your prayers, support, encouragement, free meals, and all the other ways you reached out to me and to the young leaders benefiting from this ministry.  You could have spent your money and prayers on other things.   I’m so grateful you chose to spend them here, investing in people (the true treasures) of the next generation, who desire to make a benevolent difference in our world.

I pray that God will open up the floodgates of heaven and pour out so much blessing on you that you will not have room enough for it (Mal 3:10) and it will overflow onto everyone around you, for God is a God of abundance, not scarcity.

It was your generosity and prayers that made it possible to provide this ministry in 2009 and hopefully your continued generosity and prayers will make it possible to provide it for many years to come.

May God bless you and may God bless the wonderful people of Haiti, who could use our compassion now more than ever.

In His Love,
Randy

Merry Christmas! It’s a season of celebration!

Here is an anonymous story of life-change worth celebrating.  It’s a great representation of some of the lies that many people struggle with:

My Top Ten Lies List – by Anonymous:

          “Then you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” (John 8:32)

 “Identifying and naming my Top Ten Lies was huge for me.

“Lies like:
1) I don’t have what it takes.  I’m not good enough (not smart enough, not eloquent enough, not good looking enough, not outgoing enough, not __________ enough);

2) People are thinking bad thoughts about me.  They see my flaws and inadequacies.  They are judging me, even though they are acting nice to me.  I fall short in their eyes;

3) My lovability is based on my performance – when I succeed perfectly I’m lovable, when I fail (even slightly) I am reject-able;

4) I have greater worth and value when I please people, when people think and say nice things about me;

5) If people really knew me inside, they wouldn’t love me.  I have to stay hidden;

6) I have to take control of my life.  I know better than God what I need and want for my fulfillment.  God doesn’t have my best interest at heart.  He won’t give me what I want, or he’ll ask me to do something I don’t want to do – like stay single or serve in a third-world country;

7) I have to fix myself first and get myself presentable before I can go to God;

8) Showing and feeling emotions equates to weakness.  It’s better to ignore, minimize, and/or repress them; 

9) As a leader I have to look perfect, I can’t show any weakness or vulnerability, or people won’t want to follow me;

10) When God looks at me, he’s usually disappointed.

“After naming these awful lies, I realized how much they were holding me back.  Through the mentoring process, I’m slowly claiming the Truth that offsets each lie.  Over time, I’m believing God’s truth more.  And the truth is setting me free.” – Anonymous

Closing Thoughts:

We all have lies that hold us back at times.  What are your Top Ten?

Thankfully we still have a Savior who frees us from lies and leads us into truth.  I believe he desires to remove any lies that would keep us from fully experiencing God’s extravagant love and our amazing full potential to extend love lavishly in our world.

Recently a young man said to me, “This ministry has major exponential life-change on people”.  He’s observing the rippling impact this unique ministry style can have – following Jesus’ example of pouring into qualified men and women who are equipped to pour into others, who can then pour into others, and so on…

Jesus was an amazing lover.  I think he wanted to multiply lovers like himself when he said:

“Therefore go and make disciples (lovers) of all nations, …teaching them to obey everything I commanded you…” (Matt 28:19a, 20a)

His great commandments to obey, he narrowed down to two:

“Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind and with all your strength…and…Love your neighbor as yourself.” (Mark 12:30, 31b)

Not only are the young people we are investing in becoming extraordinary disciples, they are also becoming extraordinary lovers – lovers of God, themselves, and others.  I applaud these young people for their courage to go on such a journey, and I’m grateful for their honesty.  The truth is setting them free…to love extravagantly.

Thank You:

Thank you so much for your participation in this life-changing, world-changing work.  I believe your investment in these amazing individuals will reap eternal dividends.  They truly are difference makers, living out their unique redemptive potentials in a wide range of social issues, communities, and locations.  They (and others like them), the young church, are the hope of the future.

Financial Support Update:

There is still a financial need in reaching my support-raising goal for the year.  I could use your help and your prayers!  Contributions are tax deductible.

Contact me at:  randy@legacyshepherding.org with any questions.

May you be blessed by His love this Christmas season,
Randy

Photos by mysza831 at flickr.com

Some simple decorations at my house Macy’s.

Merry Christmas! I haven’t written a Christmas letter in years – which some people may appreciate!

Here’s a brief pictorial update on my life (outside of ministry).

Friends Return:
Andy: 

Around Christmas last year, one of my closest friends, Andy, moved back to Chicago from San Diego.

“Are you sure you want to come back at the beginning of winter?” I asked.

 Talk about a rude re-entry.

He went from this:                                                      To This:

   Ahhh.                             Brrr!

It’s been great having him back.

Rusty:
In the fall, one of my other closest friends, Rusty, moved back to the Midwest from North Carolina.  He is currently attending seminary just outside of Milwaukee. 

He went from this:                                                          To this:

I took a trip up to see him:

When they are all running around in those black cassocks, the place looks like Hogwarts!  Can’t you just picture it?

Up Where We Belong?

I ventured up to the clear bottomed sky decks on the 103rd floor of the Willis Tower (former the Sears Tower). Yikes! 

I took some of these photos without looking down.  I went with my motto of the day, ”just aim and shoot…and check your pants later”!

Family Events:
Scott Graduates!: 

My youngest nephew, Scott, graduated from college this year.  Wow, they grow up so fast!  It seemed like just yesterday, he was sucking on a bottle…oh yeah, he was…at his college graduation party!  We celebrated in a park after the ceremony.

Kristin Weds!:

 One of my god-daughters (my cousin Kathy’s daughter) got married this year. She was a previous Miss Teen Minnesota.  Almost everyone from my mom’s side of the family traveled to Minnesota for the wedding. It was fun having extended time with the family…

Step Aside Picasso: 

I allowed my inner artist to express itself through painting this year.  These were my favorites:

 Some people thought the first picture was of a lady with blue hair (like Marge Simpson, I guess).  It’s supposed to be a blue head covering like the kind women wear in Muslim countries.  After these art critics told me the blue hair thing, I noticed their faces turning blue.  Then I realized my strangling grip around their throats was a little too tight!  I’m still learning how to receive constructive criticism.  It’s tough being an artist! 

I had some painting parties with friends which was fun.

I love seeing people express their creativity, including those who swear they don’t have any talent.  Those are the ones to watch.  They crank out masterpieces that put all my paintings to shame.

Birthday Celebration – 49 and holding: 

My friend, Andy, treated me to an awesome Bob Schneider concert for my birthday.  It was a FUN concert.  Lots of people singing along.  I was going to put a Youtube sample of  one of his many great songs, but then I noticed at the end it led to other songs I wouldn’t necessarily recommend.  Ahhh, living in the tension of life’s paradoxes.  I wish I could recommend all his songs.  He’s brilliant.  It truly was one of the most fun evenings I had this year. 

Praha and Pivo: 

I went to Prague this year with a 20something group from Willow Creek Church.  I got the chance to graffiti on the side of a building…all for a good cause (a promo video)! 

 It was a mission trip, so it wasn’t really a vacation.  I’m realizing I am soooo in need of a real vacation…and perhaps some Pivo (beer) would help too!  If you know of anyone with a condo someplace warm, available in February, let me know! 

 Small Group – being known & loved:

 
 My small group has been an on-going highlight.  It’s important to me to be in circles (as opposed to rows) where I can be known and loved.  Our group has been together for about two years.  We continue to dive deeper together.  I’d tell you more, but what happens in group, stays in group.  (Note: this old photo is missing Matt).

Moses From Burma: 

I love opening my home to friends who are in town.  We had numerous house guests throughout the year.  The winner of the “Traveled the Furthest” Award was a guy named Moses.

Moses is from Burma (Myanmar)(between India and Thailand).  He is a new friend of Rusty’s from seminary.  Moses experienced his first Thanksgiving with Rusty, me, and my family.  It was his first time tasting turkey, pie, and mashed potatoes. 

Whenever Moses would try something new he would say, “Welcome“.  A slice of pumpkin pie – “Welcome”.  When he’d see something amazing, he’d say, “God bless America”

We took a trip downtown.  It was the first time Moses had seen buildings over 12 stories tall.  God bless America!

Ministry: 

Many of the other highlights of the year involved ministry, which has been a huge highlight in my life…but I’m not talking about ministry in this Christmas greeting.  You can read about some of those highlights in my monthly ministry blogs.

Closing: 

That gives you a little taste of my life this year.  I’d love an update on yours.

May God bless you this holiday season and throughout the new year.

Merry Christmas and Happy New Year!

Love,
Randy

One of God’s many surprises for me this year showed up in the form of a woman named Uma from India.  Though Uma would not label herself a Christian and doesn’t fall within this ministry’s target age group, through God’s mysterious design, Uma and I have recently begun a spiritual mentoring relationship.  

Here’s a bit of Uma’s fascinating story: 

UMA’S BACKGROUND:

“I was born Hindu, and raised accordingly.  But I was a ‘questioning brat’, one who didn’t simply accept the do-it-because-we-elders-tell-you-so theory.  However, answers eluded me and frustration gnawed at me.  I didn’t understand what the rituals and chants meant.  Prayer began to feel like an alien language.  So I took the only way out: I stopped praying.

“I was also raised in an alcoholic home where my father was, often, an invisible figure.  Shame and loneliness alienated me during those secretive years.  It seemed God had cut me out, and I chose to ignore Him right back. 

“You obviously don’t care, was all I said to God in those days.

“In a casual conversation with Sister Valeria, who taught me Psychology in college, I blurted out the carefully hidden family secret – my father’s an alcoholic.  With that disclosure, my dammed up emotions flooded out of me. 

“From that day on, Sister Valeria became my friend and mentor.

“It was Sister Valeria, who I loved dearly, who introduced me to God. 

“God is sculpting you, my child, she said.  It hurts when He uses the chisel on you but at the end of it all will emerge a beautiful statue.  

“I loved those words and actually started to believe in them.

“One day she asked if I’d like to attend a prayer meeting.  I felt intense emotion rise up in me as the pastor spoke.  He used the word ‘Father’ to address God.  He asked for God’s blessings on us all, and that God would take care of those who were alone and suffering.  

“During that prayer, I had a thunderbolt moment.  God did care.  He loved me.  He was the Father I was missing.  To me, this felt like a reunion with my Father, one I’d never known.

“That was the day He took up residence in my heart.  When I closed my eyes and sought comfort, I saw a man with shoulder-length hair and warm brown eyes, and I called him Father.

“Even today, I have no attachment to labels.  I don’t let them define me.  I am Hindu and Christian and Buddhist all in one, because I try to absorb the best lessons that all religions offer.  

“But the God I see and the one I pray to is the Father who lives in my heart.  I feel a sense of peace wash over me when I talk to Him, just as I would to a dear friend.

UMA’S LONG JOURNEY TO THE U.S.:

“My husband’s sister who was living in the United States applied for our immigrant status.  We waited with eager anticipation.  

“Fifteen years later, long after the excitement of the mailman’s daily arrival faded and we’d forgotten all about the possibility, the US Consulate contacted us.  Within two weeks, green cards fell into our laps and we had a decision to make.

“We prayed, and decided that if everything went as planned, it would be a sign that God had blessed this move and had a plan for us.  And so it was.

“When my husband, teenage daughter and I moved eight thousand miles from Chennai (India) to Chicago in May 2008, we arrived with dreams and plans. 

“Ten days later, my mom was diagnosed with stage four breast cancer.

“Transitioning into a new culture and coping with a loved one’s terminal illness is enough to unhinge the sanest.  I felt alone and friendless, disconnected and isolated from those I held dear. 

“This was a far cry from the adventure we’d set out on.  It was like being trapped in the middle of a nightmare.

“Eight months after the fatal diagnosis, mom stole away from us forever.

HOW UMA MET RANDY:

“I tried to pick up the threads of my life.  A very dear friend of mine, Andy, who I met through work, threw me a life-line and suggested I meet Randy.

“The idea took root right away.  A mentor had been on my Wish List to God for some time but my mental image of the person did not include theology, saffron robes or beads.  Randy arrived in faded blue jeans, wearing a sunshiny smile, speaking a language my heart understood.

“Not only was I dealing with enormous grief over the loss of a loved one, but her death had unleashed a series of existential dilemmas I was feverishly seeking answers to.

“My head buzzed with ‘Why’s but there were no answers.

“Randy, in his inimitable way, shifted that focus a tad bit and opened up a world of possibilities.  Instead of ‘Why’, ask ‘What’ you’re meant to learn from this experience, he said to me.  With that statement as my guide, I now navigate my days with more grace.  I now know that every experience God sends me, good, bad or ugly, contains a lesson.  Together, they form the blueprint of my life.

“My growth journey with Randy has just begun.  I know we have miles to discover.  All I know is I couldn’t have asked for a better Sherpa.” – Uma Girish 

THANK YOU:

Uma is an amazingly loving woman who attempts to faithfully follow God’s leadings.  Throughout her day she continually seeks him, asking, Who should I talk to today? and What would you want me to say?  She can often be found comforting and encouraging the elderly.

Though Uma didn’t fall within the ministry’s target group (Y-generation Christians desiring to discover and live out their unique redemptive purpose in this world) and part of me wondered, Why would she want to meet with me?, I felt a prompting to follow God’s preparations, and Uma seemed confident she’d found the right person.  

I have no idea what will happen as Uma and I journey together, but I’m up for the adventure and all the learning we will share.  

One thing I do know is that she is very tender towards God (including Jesus) and cares deeply for others.  The love inside her flows out naturally – it takes action as she attempts to follow her Father’s nudges.

Thank you for partnering with me in providing this life-changing discipleship ministry to the next generation of Christian leaders, and to amazing seekers and charitable lovers like Uma.  Your prayers and financial support are making a huge difference.   

If you haven’t already taken the opportunity, will you pray about it and partner with me?  My email is randy@legacyshepherding.org

Happy Thanksgiving!  

In His Love,
Randy

PS  Uma is a writer.  She returned to India briefly after her mom’s diagnosis and then again for her mother’s funeral.  An article written by her about the day her mother’s head was shaved was published in an on-line medical magazine.  To read Uma’s Article click here.

YOU CAN’T CAN HANDLE THE TRUTH:

Imagine standing in front of eight of your peers and finishing the statement:

“The truth I don’t want you to know about me is…”

How would you complete that sentence?  How would you feel being that vulnerable with other people?

That was how we kicked off an intense men’s retreat weekend, I recently co-facilitated, for seven 20something leaders.  All weekend the retreat participants shared vulnerably and the retreat became incredibly redemptive!

QUOTES FROM THE WEEKEND:

“That was the most transformational experience I’ve ever been part of…This weekend was deeply transformative for me.” – Andy Tucker

“I have been noticing a big difference in myself and my relationships.  I feel like I am able to love without forcing it.  I feel a lot of strength and passion as well.  The vulnerability everyone showed was amazing.  I was shocked.  It was obviously life-changing for all of us.” – Scotty

“I believe what happened has changed me…SET ME FREE from the bondage I was in emotionally.  I was reluctant to face that pain inside of me, but with the group’s encouragement I believe something transformational happened.  I think we all saw the power of God working itself out as we confronted truth and love.” – Nick Rode

“I was extremely impressed.  Men who are willing to do what it takes to grow and make a positive impact in their world get much honor in my book.  I spent the weekend with eight such men and I can think of NO other way I would have rather spent my time.  Those were holy and special moments that I will treasure.  I saw a lot of honesty.  I saw a lot of strength.  I saw a lot of courage.  I saw a lot of gold.  Much love to Randy for cultivating such a group.” – Erik Racine (co-facilitator of the weekend)

WHY THIS MINISTRY IS IMPORTANT:

Incredible things are happening in this ministry!  It’s so exciting being a part of the amazing work God is doing.  And it appears to be very needed.

A recent study showed that only about 14% of the Y-generation (individuals born approximately between the late 70’s and the early 90’s, totaling over 70 million people in the U.S.) currently attend church.  The majority of individuals within the Y generation say they have a spiritual interest.  They simply are not interested in what “organized religion” is offering.  (Hmmm. I’m often not very interested in what “organized religion” is offering either.)  What’s the Church doing about this drastic decline?

Other studies show that one of the most effective means of spiritual growth is having a spiritual mentor.  If that’s true (and I believe it is from personal experience), how do we equip more people to be spiritual mentors?  And meet people in the Y – generation right where they are at?

THE HOPE AND MISSION OF THIS MINISTRY:

I’m thrilled to have the opportunity to pour into young leaders of the Y-generation who will lovingly pass on what they have received.  That is the hope and mission of this ministry.  To leave a legacy of love by holistically developing next generation leaders with love and for love, helping them discover and realize their unique redemptive potential in this world.

The 28 young leaders I’ve had the honor of mentoring this year have incredible potential.  They are amazing!

MEET THE LEADERS WHO ATTENDED THE RETREAT:

Nick Rode is a high-school guidance counselor and the leader of a Fellowship of Christian Athletes (basketball) group at his high school.  Nick has an amazing desire to pour into high-school students at such a critical time in their lives.  With depression and suicide rates on the rise, I’m glad Nick is in a high school, extending God’s love and hope.  Students and parents notice a difference in him.

Andy Tucker is currently passing on the legacy by effectively mentoring three leaders in their twenties, two of whom are leading community groups within the Y-generation.  Andy’s a great blend of strength and tenderness.  He loves people well and inspires them to grow – that includes me!

Scotty is leaving a lucrative job and following a call back to Africa in October.  Scotty will be spending a year (possibly more) running projects that will provide opportunities to share God’s love through actions and words.  Read about Scotty’s initial trip and current updates at Scotty’s blog .  Scotty has many fascinating stories and some awesome photos (Check out the fun one on the left!).  It’s definitely worth a visit.

Mike Belke is also willing to sacrifice and leave behind his job, family, friends, and security to follow the leading he feels from God.  He and his wife will be moving to California at the end of the year, where his wife, Christina, will be doing an internship program at Mosaic Church (where Erwin McManus is pastor).  I look forward to seeing what the future holds for this amazing, surrendered couple.

Gabe Strom is mentoring individuals in the area of social media.  Through speaking engagements and one-on-one coaching, Gabe continues to incorporate and pass on the spiritual lessons he has learned through our times together.  Gabe is an incredibly dynamic, inspirational, and influential leader who is making a difference in the business world.

Troy Creamer continues to have amazing breakthroughs.  People around him have been encouraged to take steps on their own journeys just by watching the changes in him and hearing him enthusiastically share what he has been learning.  Troy has been a wonderfully supportive cheerleader of this ministry.

Jeff Leslie has led a 20something missional community hub and may lead another with his new wife.  I don’t regularly meet with Jeff, but was thrilled to have him on the weekend.  He is a great man with remarkable strengths.  Thumbs up, Jeff!

WILL YOU PARTNER WITH ME?:

The call to “make disciples” within the Y-generation appears to be more urgent than ever.

Will you partner financially with me in this ministry? I need your help and I believe you will be blessed through giving.  An added benefit: contributions are tax deductible!

Thank you so much for joining me on this amazing journey.

Contact me at randy@legacyshepherding.org with any questions.

In His Love,
Randy